I shouldn't live on an island, even if the scenery is fabulous.

Today I met up with an old Mommy friend from when my daughter was in playgroup. From the age of 1 through about 6 I met up with my daughter's playgroup one to two times a week. We finally stopped when all of the kids started kindergarten. It was just too difficult to get everyone together. Now that she was in school I thought she had outgrown playgroup. What I failed to recognize was that I hadn't. In fact, I need it now more than ever, I just didn't know it. While sitting with this playgroup friend today we started discussing our children and how annoying they can be. (If you don't know what I'm talking about, you either have no children or a lot of nannies.)

By nature, kids are annoying. They think the world revolves around them, they have no qualms about LOUD public displays of emotions. Embarrassment over crying and whining in public hasn't hit them yet. Heck, farting and burping in public doesn't even seem to embarrass them yet. They chew with their mouths open. (Please don't tell me that my 7 year-old is the only one that does this.) If they don't like something they will loudly proclaim that it is "gross" even if you drove to three different stores for ingredients and slaved hours over the stove to make it. (Please don't tell me that my husband is the only 46 year-old that does this.)

I was starting to feel like either I was the worst mother in the world because I wanted to lock myself in my room every time my daughter got that look on her face that said some serious whining was on the way or I had failed because I haven't been able to teach her how to reign in her emotions. I thought I was the only Mom going through this with the only kid on the planet who didn't act right all of the time.

It's so easy to forget that there are other people out there going through the same things. With juggling work, exercise, child care, groceries, dinner, tidying up the house, lunch, breakfast, dinner, back to school, end of school, summer camps, dishes, oil changes, vacation planning (I don't mind this one too much), packing, traveling, unpacking, discipline, family activities, laundry, homework, tracking TV time, and don't forget Husband "activities"; I'm pooped. I forgot about seeing my friends, hanging out and talking. I was on an island of my own making and I was alone. Very alone.

Without playgroup I didn't get to see other kids interact with their mothers and see that I'm not the only one. I forgot that we all struggle to be a good parent. Because being a good one is a heck of a lot harder than being a crappy one. Imagine how little pressure you'd feel if you didn't bother yourself with worrying that you were raising a polite and loving human being. You could just let them run around like little heathens, say yes to every request, never waste your precious energy laying down the law. You could plop them in front of the TV and go about your business with no worries about the killing of their brain cells.

And to know that you are not alone is a powerful thing. Didn't Hilary Clinton write a book called, "It Takes a Village"? For some reason I moved out of the village into a house way high up on a hill and I was not better off for it. I was all alone with no one to tell me that they too want to either lock their children out of the house or lock themselves in a room alone. But today, I stumbled back into the village. I was lost, but luckily I found my way back. And I hope I make more of an effort to spend time with my friends again and not get caught up in day-to-day life and forget that I don't have to live it alone.